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Dunne, Finley Peter, 1867-1936

"Mr. Dooley: In the Hearts of His Countrymen"

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"How was it he wanted to do it?" Mr. Hennessy asked.
"Well," said Mr. Dooley, "'twas this way. This is th' way it was. Ol'
Cervera's fleet was in th' harbor an' bottled up, as th' man says.
Shafter he says to Sampson: 'Look here, me bucko, what th' divvle
ar-re ye loafin' ar-round out there f'r,' he says, 'like a dep'ty
sheriff at a prize fight?' he says. 'Why don't ye go in, an' smash th'
Castiles?' he says. 'I'm doin' well where I am,' says Sampson. 'Th'
navy iv th' United States,' he says, 'which is wan iv th' best, if not
th' best, in th' wurruld,' he says, 'was not,' he says, 'intinded f'r
sthreet fightin',' he says. 'We'll stay here,' he says, 'where we
ar-re,' he says, 'until,' he says, 'we can equip th' ships with
noomatic tire wheels,' he says, 'an' ball bearin's,' he says.
"'Well,' says Shafter, 'if ye won't go in,' he says, 'we'll show ye
th' way,' he says. An' he calls on Cap Brice, that was wan iv th'
youngest an' tastiest dhressers in th' whole crool an' devastatin'
war. 'Cap,' he says, 'is they anny hay in th' camp?' he says.


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