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Dunne, Finley Peter, 1867-1936

"Mr. Dooley: In the Hearts of His Countrymen"

'Is that so?' says Cousin George. 'Well, I don't
b'lieve in sinkin' me own ship,' he says. 'Whin I'm lookin' f'r a
divarsion iv that kind, I sink somebody else's,' he says. ''Tis
cheaper. As f'r th' other thing,' he says, 'th' less ye say about
that, th' betther,' he says. 'If some iv these beauchious Ph'lippeen
belles ar-round here hears,' he says, 'that ye're in that line, they
may call on ye to give ye a chaste salute,' he says, 'an',' he says,
'f'rget,' he says, 'to take th' see-gars out iv their mouths,' he
says. 'Ye desthroyed a lot iv coal, ye tell me,' he says. 'Do ye,' he
says, 'go downstairs now, an' shovel up a ton or two iv it,' he says.
'Afther which,' he says, 'ye can roll a kag iv beer into me bedroom,'
he says; 'f'r 'tis dhry wurruk settin' up here watchin' ixpansion
ixpand,' he says.
"That's what Cousin George 'll say to th' Loot. An', whin th' Loot
comes back, he won't be a hero anny more; an', if anny woman thries to
kiss him, he'll climb a three. Cousin George 'll make a man iv him.
'Tis kicks, not kisses, that makes men iv heroes.


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