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Dunne, Finley Peter, 1867-1936

"Mr. Dooley: In the Hearts of His Countrymen"

I mind wanst, afther
'twas inthrojooced, th' loot says to Andy Rohan,--he's a sergeant now,
be hivins!--he says, 'Go out,' he says, 'an' fetch in Mike McGool, th'
safe robber,' he says. 'Here's his description,' he says: 'eyelashes,
eight killomethres long; eyes, blue an' assymethrical; jaw,
bituminous; measuremint fr'm abaft th' left ear to base iv maxillory
glan's, four hectograms; a r-red scar runnin' fr'm th' noomo-gasthric
narve to th' sicond dorsal verteebree,' he says. 'Tis so. I have th'
description at home in th' cash dhrawer. Well, Andy come in about six
o'clock that night, lookin' as though he'd been thryin' to r-run a fut
race acrost a pile iv scrap ir'n; an' says he, 'Loot,' he says, 'I've
got him,' he says. "I didn't take th' measuremints,' he says,
'because, whin I pulled out th' tape line, he rowled me eighty
hectograms down th' sthreet,' he says. 'But 'tis Mike McGool,' he
says. 'I don't know annything about his noomo-gasthric narves,' he
says, 'but I reco'nized his face,' he says. 'I've r-run him in fifty
times,' he says.
"Bertillon, besides bein' a profissor iv detictives, is a handwritin'
expert, which is wan iv th' principal industhries iv Fr-rance at th'
prisint time.


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